Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Thoughts for Thursday: 1 Month Mama.

This week marks the first month of me being a SAHM. 

Here are some scattered and random tired thoughts. 

1. Everyday I have to out smart a 1-year old. When he makes his 1st noise over the monitor, I immediately get out of bed and wash my face, brush teeth and get dressed. If I can squeeze in making up my bed, that's a win. When I say get dressed, I mean, put on the uniform of yoga pants and a t-shirt. Before I walk in his room, I try to have his waffle in the toaster. He likes breakfast served to him immediately. And I try to comply with the boss. 

2. After he eats a squeezable, if I give him the top to buys me 20 minutes. He will sit in his chair and take the top off, then screw it back on, then take it off, then back on, etc. Seriously, I can unload and load the dishwasher. 

3. Now that I'm home everyday, we have adopted the nursing home schedule. 

6 am- Wake up
9:30 am- Nap
10:30 am- Snack
11:30 am- Lunch
2:30 pm- Nap
3:30 pm- Snack
5:30 pm- Dinner
7 pm- Bed Time

A month ago, he would have a 5:30 snack while I cooked dinner. But, I substituted that with dinner. His little days are so jammed packed that he is all but begging to go to bed at 7pm. 
Last night after he polished off his milk, he handed me his cup and laid on the living room floor. I had to pick up my limp little noodle and carry him to bed. 

4. Don't let the devil get in. He will get in your mind and pay mind games over money, motherhood, and other random crazy thoughts. Kick.him.out. You are right where you belong for your family, whether that's at work or at home. 

Switching gears......let's talk about how this week has kicked me. 

On Monday, H worked from home and I was recovering from eating something that didn't like me back. However, I managed to wash ALL of the laundry in our house. Every.Single.Piece. 

Tuesday was cleaning day. The house was quiet and the kitchen was mopped. All was well until I walked in the guest room and saw a lizard. 

I SCREAMED! If we are real life frands, you know that I'm deathly afraid of lizards. A lizard is just a snake that hasn't lost it's legs yet. 

I would rather deal with an alligator than a lizard. 

Anyway, I screamed which made Oscar go hide in our closet. Thank you oh little guard dog. You are great. I screamed loud enough that I was secretly hoping our neighbor would come and check on me. I wanted him to remove the lizard. 

Meanwhile, satan's serpent ran into the closet. So this had to happen for me to get him in a box and then out the door:

I didn't exactly want to clean out the closet. But- it's now clean. 

When telling my oh-so sensitive dad about my traumatic experience, he pointed out that "no-one has ever gone to the hospital, much less the first-aid station due to a lizard." 

I may have mumbled something about the lizards down in Mexico being as big as a dog and I'm sure someone has. 

Mamas! Why do the wheels fall off during the day while the dads are at work?!? WHY?!? I was about 5 minutes away from just closing the closet door and taping the bottom shut. That was going to be H's project for the night: OPERATION KILL THE LIZARD THEN VACUUM SEAL ALL OF THE BLANKETS THAT ARE ON THE TOP SHELF.

On Wednesday, Big Buddy and I had a play date at Kids Rule (an indoor jump jump place). Although it's indoors, they don't believe in air conditioning. 

Obviously my child liked this. 
He was a trooper and let us hang out with our frands all day. 
However, after he drank his milk cup last night, he laid on the living room floor and wanted to just sleep there. I call that a successful day! 

Every morning I declare to Jax and the weenie dog that I will go to bed earlier than I did the night before. AND every night, it's still 10 pm! My OCD tendencies won't let me go to bed with dishes in the sink or clothes on the couch now. 

Hopefully today will be a little calmer and less traumatic on my nerves. 
Goal of the day: nap time and early bed time. 
I don't want to overachieve or anything. 


  1. Amen on the "don't let the devil get in." When he tries, I go sit outside in my swing and I'm good. :) Sometimes you just need nature. You need a cat for the lizards. ;) A few years ago when one got in our house, I grabbed the cat, threw him in the room, and shut the door. The lizard was dead when I got home from work. :) And yes, everything goes wrong when the daddies are at work. A pipe busted in our bathroom a couple weeks ago, on a weekday morning, of course. I had to hold it in a certain position to stop the water flow for 30 minutes until Kev made it home. :/ That was real fun with a cat and a toddler screaming.

    1. That's when you tell CG to go put on her swimsuit! ha!

  2. Lizards are my biggest fear. I totally empathize.