Maternity Leave.

Mamas.....I wanna make the most of my maternity leave. When I go back to work, I don't want to be as big and pasty as I am now! I've been thinking about small, reasonable goals that will give me an ounce of satisfaction when achieved. 

Here are my pipe dreams.....for the next 2 months:
(FYI: Month 1 was spent with a lot of couch time with my new favorite man)

- Read a book- I figure I can read while pumping....right??

- Daily walk in the hood- I need the exercise and the bambino needs some fresh air. 

- Take a day "trip" once a week- this could be simply driving to my parents house....or Mom-O's home...or a "play date" with a friend. I'm thinking a place where make-up isn't required and a baseball cap is permissible. 

- Go to work- during my leave, I actually need to go to the office for a 2-day event. This event will be at the end of my leave, so it will be perfect for me to do a dry-run for when I return. 

-Cook a meal once (maybe twice) a week- I love to cook! I love to have a glass of vino while cooking! It's my element.....and decompressing time. However, cooking is very limited with a newborn......however, I need to get back in my groove. 

Confession: it took an hour to make jambalaya last week due to a little boy having a meltdown.  

I don't want to include house chores on my list. I'm sorta a "clean as you go" kind of gal. I tend to make up the bed before I go to work, and load the dishwasher before bed. Chores are chores and unless I'm shampooing carpet, I don't get a lot of satisfaction from it. 

I don't want to overload myself here. I mean, I'm giving myself a 2-month deadline to read a book.....what did you do to help yourself feel "normal" and come out of the fog called new mommyhood?

Pregnancy Updates....

- I'm 9 months pregnant. I can't even handle. 

- I'm ROCKIN' cankles like none-other. My ankle bone can't be found. Flip flops leave lines in my foot. 

- I asked my man if my face is as fat as my feet, and he replied:  "No babe.....your face isn't ANYTHING like it was in college." 

 Please continue to punch me in the gut. I enjoy it. 

It's no secret that I may have weighed as much as my 9 month pregnant self my freshman year of college. I blame it on the dorms and the cafeteria plan that dad bought. I really blame my freshman 20 on my dad. He reminded me EVERYDAY that he purchased 3 meals for me that day........and starving kids in Africa.....blah..blah...so I ate.

- This child's nursery is FULL! What a great little problem to have! I kindly told my mom.....please don't buy anything without checking with me first. Then, I'm going to tell her not to buy it and just save the money to put towards his college education. 

- It's funny how your mind changes in your 9th month. Things that I worried about in the beginning are no longer on my radar at this point. They just don't matter anymore. Of course I want my Dr. to deliver my baby.....but if she doesn't.....it's ok. I'm still having a baby either way. 

- Sleeping through the night is a distant memory for me. It hasn't happened in MONTHS! I wake up about every 2-3 hours now. So, I have been sleeping on the couch. It's easier for me to roll off to go to the ladies room at 3:30. Periodically through the night, H will wake me up just to make sure I'm breathing and haven't birth the babe. 

- The weenie dog buddies know something is UP! Oscar keeps stealing toys from the nursery and is constantly getting in trouble. Since Coopie is deaf, he has no idea how good the squeakers are in kids toys! I may have exchanged 1 toy already because it would send Oscar into a frenzy!! Oscar will sit by the nursery and whine for us to open the door. When we do, he runs to the toy basket and picks up the orange monkey teether. 

- When you are 9 months pregnant.......your body is comical. If you want to laugh until you cry at yourself........try on a bathing suit at 9 months. I sent my man a selfie from the dressing room. 

He replied back with 1 word: NOOOO!!!

- Bottles and pacis were washed this week. This poor child may very well starve due to the fact his mom has a hard time just taking the cap off of his bottles. Mom of the year right here. 

Mother's Day....

This Mother's Day was a little bittersweet for me. 

While I was so happy to be 9 months pregnant and FINALLY have a reason to celebrate the day, I kept thinking about all of my friends that are dying to be in my position with pregnancy. 

Mother's Day was always so hard for me the last few years. It was so nice to see sweet photos of my friends and their little munchkins, but it's ANOTHER reminder that a year has gone by and I'm not receiving a macaroni necklace, or a painted picture from school or a handprint in a piece of pottery. 

To all of the ladies who cried, mourned and needed distractions on Mother's Day............you are not alone. It's hard.....but, it helps mold you into a stronger woman that makes you appreciate motherhood on a new level. Every night, I thank God for the kickboxer in my stomach and for the joy he is about to bring our house. For all of the solemn Mother's Days from my past, they make me fully appreciate the card I received yesterday from H and the baby. 

I would tell you that it gets better, but it doesn't. It's not better until you are pregnant or holding your baby in your arms. That's the real truth about infertility. Even when the statistics are on your side......they mean nothing. 

Ladies: keep advocating for your baby. Keep asking God to fulfill your hopes. Of course I would have LOVED to have had our baby years ago.......but, it has been so much fun to go through this experience with all of my friends this year. 
Your Mother's Day is coming......and you will wear that macaroni necklace with pride. And possibly to work on Monday. 

Next year, I'll be wrestling a little boy to keep his socks and shoes on for pictures all while screaming "it's my first mother's day!! I've waited YEARS for this picture!!"

Baby Shower Part #2

Get ready for picture overload.

This shower was soo much fun! I'm sad that it's over and I'm no longer visiting with my friends all weekend. It was like a 3-day party. 

Mar and Emmaline were our house guest for the weekend. Me and the doggies are sad they have gone home. 

Sweet College Friends! 3 out of the 4 of us are preggers! 

Sweet opinionated Mom-O and my rockin' Mama! 

Baby Buddy received his 1st cowbell!!!! It's already on his night stand! 

One of my favorite gifts!! 

Excuse my chinese eyes.....and simply focus on the onesie! 

Sweet outfit from Mom-O! 

Just a FEW of the hostesses!! 

Favorite previous boss EVER! Love her! And she loves baby buddy even more. 

The prego club.  (May, October and June due dates)

The 3-Muskateers! 

The Walley Fam Jam! Mom and my soon to be "seester"!

The shower was again, WONDERFUL! The gifts were great, but the guests were even better! 

Next up, pictures and post from my work baby shower! 

Part #1 is here.

Baby Shower Part #1

My dear sweet Sunday School class hosted the most delightful baby shower for us this past Sunday afternoon.  

It's fun for the tables to finally turn and for me to be able to hold up the gifts for viewing! 

It was beautiful and so much fun! By the way, baby showers are so much more fun than wedding showers (when you are being the guest of honor). With a wedding shower, you are overwhelmed with crockpots and casserole dishes and you think about all of the entertaining that you need to do with it all. With a baby shower.......you hold up sweet little gowns and just think about rocking your child. 

Well, then you open up diapers and think of poop. 

The attention to detail was remarkable! I'm forever grateful for the love and support all of the ladies showed us! Oh and the gifts! Lard have mercy at the gifts! I have never "oooed" and "aahhheed" so much at the sweetest (and a lot of practical) baby gifts. 

A big shout out to Anna for opening up her gorgeous home to us! It was perfect. 

Crossing the Line......Pregnancy Style

As soon as you start showing a baby bump......people cross the line. They feel a certain need to ask you questions that really don't matter. It's like a right of passage to motherhood.....

Because I try to be a nice person and make Jesus proud, I rarely tell them what I'm thinking. One day, I'll probably snap. 

Women also feel the need to tell you about their awful birthing stories. It's like the bigger your eyes get, the more detail they provide.

Why?

Why do this to a first time mom? I beg you, please let me go to the hospital and think that everything is going to be peaches and roses. 

Questions pregnant women don't want to answer or talk about:

1. When they ask your due date......(and you tell them).....and they laugh and say you won't make it to then. 

Thank you for implying that I'm fat. Excuse me while I get more ice cream to feel better about myself.  

2. How much weight have you gained? 

How much weight have YOU gained?? You tell me your  weight first, then I'll tell you mine. 

My grandmother is slightly obsessed with my weight. She is so worried about preeclampsia. 
My Dr. isn't worried about it. 

3. Please tell me about your awful birthing story again. 

4. Oh- my life will change when the baby arrives? 

No.Way.

For the record: I want my life to change. I want to hear the giggles of a little boy in my house. I want to hear the pitter-patter of his footed pjs on the tile floor. I want my Saturday's to revolve around him. I can't wait for my life TO change. 

5. Do you REALLY want a boy?

Not really. I just wanted a healthy baby. Having a boy was just icing on the cake. Little boys love their mamas! 

6. True story: someone touched my belly......so I touched theirs. 

Can we lay out some generic pregnancy ground rules? These not only apply to me but pregnant women everywhere. 

#1- If you don't touch a woman's stomach when there isn't a baby in there......don't touch it when there is one. 

#2- If you don't ask someone what they weigh when they are not pregnant, don't ask them while they are and you know they weigh more. 

#3- Birthing a child is gonna hurt.....no matter the method. Unless you sneezed and your baby popped out or you can withstand surgery without pain pills, let's not make other women terrified of the process. 

Being pregnant is fun, sweet at times and at the end, very rewarding. It's sorta like being a parent too.......fun, sweet at times and very rewarding. 

Over the weekend, H asked me if I would miss being pregnant.....at the time he asked....I told him yes.
Last night at 10:30 while breathing through a contraction, I changed my mind. 

While I'll miss the kicks in my big belly......I will get to hold and rub on the feet of a little baby! 

Pregnancy for me has been fun and enjoyable. Even with the odd questions, comments and advice.......I can't wait to do it again. However, for the record.....I will be waiting a WHILE to do it again! 

Did you receive any weird advice......comments.....questions?? 
Do share and make me feel better! 

BabyMoon- Walking in Memphis

H and I had the most delightful weekend in Memphis. A little back story here, we met in Memphis and felt it was only fitting to return there while pregnant. 

Friday night, we dined at Majestic Grill. The food was fab! While in the ladies room, a couple of teenagers were complaining about their feet hurting in their super high heels. 

I couldn't control my tongue......so I may have said to them: "try hauling around a 8 month preggers belly in wedges all while walking 5 blocks to get here because your man thinks 5 blocks are nothing!" 

They responded with: oh, your pregnant!! 

I don't know if they were mocking me or paying me a compliment.  I thanked them kindly and complimented their shorty-short dress. 

This weekend was a pivotal point for my feet. They are now retaliating against me. They are shrinking in size, but growing in width. Fun times. 

At one point on Saturday, I ditched the wedges and purchased flip flops, which left indentations on my feet. My loving man thought that was funny. 

Anyway, back to the trip.....it was great....relaxing and much needed. 

Saturday, we dined at Rendezvous where we met the most delightful ladies that gave us name advice. It's sorta funny.....because sometimes when we meet complete strangers, we may tell them our baby name. Other times, we tell them that we don't know yet and we need to decide. The 3-ladies asked.....and H said that we don't know yet. Then, he asked for suggestions. 

Pandora's box is now open. 

These nice strangers first admitted they had attended the Beer Festival and had been partaking in the spirits all.day.long. 

Well.....this is about to get fun! 

They gave us ALL types of names....their top contenders were Ryan and Parker. H told them it has to be a "solid" name that sounds good over a loudspeaker on a football field.  They said that Park Jones and Ryan Jones sound like pro-football names. 

If I didn't have some monogram items already, I think H would like to change our son's name. 

Anyway, after the ladies left us to go eat their BBQ, H and I busted out laughing. Then he followed up with "well, that wouldn't have been near as fun if we had just told them his name."

True. 

While in Memphis, we did a little maternity photo shoot. 
Of course there is a story to go with anything that we do. 

Of.Course.

While standing on the corner of Jefferson and Main up against a brick wall taking this photo.........

A homeless man started haggling us. He wanted to pay us so he could take a pic with me. He was relentless. Would.Not.Stop. 
And H kept snapping pics as my expressions changed with his haggles. 

Exhibit A:

After we quickly left.....H almost busted a gut as we walked away. 

My loving baby daddy turned to me and said: "you just got hustled off your corner by a homeless man."

Thank you honey. 
I have no words for that. 

Side caveat: when we were leaving to go to dinner, we saw the haggler being put into the back of a cop car. 

Here's my favorite photo: 

After that photo was taken, I switched to flip-flops. They are now my shoe of choice. 

Oh- let's rewind to Friday night fun. 

When you are preggers, you wake up 50-11 times in the middle of the night to go to the ladies room. I'm at the stage where I need help rolling out of bed. So, I have to lovingly wake my man up for assistance. Anyway, at 3:46, I'm rolling out of bed. 

At 3:48, I'm back in bed. 

At 3:57, the fire alarm goes off. 

At 4:05, H is telling me to get dressed so we can evacuate. 

This is where I tell him negative. 

We are on the 8th floor. That means, 8 flights of stairs. And I'm 8 months preggers. 

No. I'm not evacuating. I will have a firefighter take me out the window before I crawl down 8 flights of stairs at 4 in the morning. 

As H is getting dressed to evacuate.......I call the front desk and asked what was going on....and told them to call me back if this is "for real."

The firetrucks came and went......and our breakfast was complimentary the next morning....and come to find out.....a 16 year old boy had been smoking. Seriously. 

I couldn't be too mad at the little smoker......since I was already awake.....and snagged a free breakfast of Starbucks and French toast with strawberries....but geezzz......

I never asked if they kicked him out......he certainly cost the hotel some money! 

Next trip will be back to Memphis in July for a wedding!! Hopefully I'll be in normal shoes again and walking 5 blocks won't put me out of breath! 

Baby Buddy's Hospital Bag.

It makes me feel accomplished that I have packed the baby's hospital bag.
I would say that I'm ready to birth a child, but that would be a lie.

Here's what I've got so far:

1. Wipes. As much as it costs to give birth, can you believe the hospital doesn't provide wipes!

2. Paci. Again, our hospital doesn't promote paci's. So, I've packed our own.

3. (2) blankets. The baby blue blanket is his "coming home" blanket that our neighbor's sweet mom made for him. It matches the blue in his coming home outfit. Stuff like that matters. 

4. (2) shirts. I realize the hospital provides white shirts.......but, I had 2 shirts monogrammed for him that are teeny tiny....and I think this will be the only time he will be able to wear them.

5. A hat. Again, I know the hospital will provide a hat.....but he needs to wear his hat with his name on it.

I had to flip it for the pic.

6. His guest book. I want to have his hand and foot prints added to the inside of the book, then, have guests sign it.

7. His MSU shirt. This is strickly for photos! He's a baby bulldog and it needs proper documentation.

8. Candle. This is his "0" candle that will be used in his hospital photo.

9. Nametag. This is how we will introduce him to the world.

10. Mittens. Aren't these presh?! 

11. Nursing cover. Because, well. 

12. And of course, his coming home outfit! 

What am I missing? 

Is there something obvious that I'm forgetting? 

After our babymoon, I'll pack up my bags......then, go throw up! Approximately 61 days people! 

I can't even deal. 

Thoughts for Thursday......

We had the most delightful weekend.

It started off with our neighbor's 1st birthday party. I indulged myself in (2) juice boxes and the most marvelous cake ever! I thought about texting my neighbor later in the day and asking if I could come over for milk and cake. I refrained.

Then, we bought a new mattress. I felt the need to try it out at 2pm with an afternoon nap. I thought it was a good use of my time to nap while H weeded the flowerbed.
I used the pregnancy card.

Later we took dinner to sweet friends that just birthed a sweet baby girl.

Sunday consisted of church, lunch, big fat nap, LOTS of rain and laziness! Lazy Sunday's are the best. They make for a perfect day. You are recharged for the week, normally have a great meal that sets you up for a successful nap and the icing on the cake were raindrops hitting the window. See, I'm still thinking about cake! 

Monday afternoon on my drive home from work, I thought I was about to birth a child on the side of Hwy 59. As soon as I arrived home, I soaked in a "luke-warm" bath, then crawled in bed. When H arrived home around 7:45ish..... I proceeded to tell him:

"Hey- there's chicken in the refrigerator. Cook it. It's organic, so it's expensive and I don't want it to go to waste. Don't mind me, I'm just laying in bed trying not to birth our son. Oh, and will you turn down the air.......I'm hott."

On Tuesday afternoon, H and I saw the baby buddy during the 4-D ultrasound. The ultrasound confirmed our sneaky suspicions: we are I'm having a big baby! And he has turned.

He has the most precious face ever and the sweetest little lips. H had to ask if the baby is still a boy.....so in his 4-d glory, he's still a boy!

The "art work" to go over his crib is complete. 
H took apart an old distressed pallet for the wood pieces, then, he fused them back together like magic. Meanwhile, I painted the letters of his name and glued them on the wood......and TA DA! Boom! It's DONE!

His nursery is officially complete. Praise be to the Lard, there's nothing else to do in the nursery!

Next blog post will be what I've packed for his hospital bag! I feel prepared on it.....which means that I'm forgetting something obvious. 

Pregnancy Updates

- This sweet child of mine. He is already a mess!
This past weekend, he partied like it was 1999.
On Monday......he slept it off.

At 4 pm, I thought it would be wise to call my Dr. and see if I need to do anything with my lazy boy.

They said Yes!

10 minutes later, this was happening:

Please don't mistake my black tights for skinny jeans.
I know my limits. 

My baby daddy was in the Jackson airport as he was trying to board a plane for a business trip. Of course he was concerned, so I had to put the phone up to the monitor so he could hear the heartbeat.
It's like he's fond of the little buddy already! 

I told him to get a drink and simmer.


- On Monday afternoon after Baby Buddy was lazy.......we came home to 2 baby gifts!

Maaaroooonnn!!!! Whhhiiitteee! 

I can't show a pic of the sweet gift that little Mae Harbuck mailed us from Charlotte, NC because it may or may not have his monogram on it.

- I'm 28 weeks this week! I think I'll need to breathe in a bag when I hit the 30 week mark.

- My little friend,  HEARTBURN has returned for a visit. Drs. should rename it throat burn! At 1:30 am, 2:16 am, 3:49 am, 4:15 am and 5:24 am........it will make you promise yourself that you will not eat ANYTHING the next day. Then, you remember that you are preggers and you have to eat. Then, you cry yourself to sleep (until you have to go pee again)......while snuggled up to a body pillow because your main squeeze is still out of town.

- Last Friday, I was H's golf buddy while he played in a scramble. Anyway, this was my view.

I had to hold my belly and computer as we moved from hole to hole. Working woman problems.

After the golf game was finished......I asked for some fried foods, and he delivered:

H invited a co-worker to eat with us, and I may have eaten off of his plate too!

- At this point, the only weenie dog allowed in the nursery is this one:

I squealed with delight when I opened this package and then opened his little doggie. We have the sweetest friends ever that just send us baby gifts because they love our little boy already. 

The card from our friend Missy, simply said: You know I had to buy this!! 

I called her immediately and said: You know I squealed and scouted out a place to monogram his name! 

Pregnancy Updates....

1. Baby boy moves EVERYDAY! The child is a ninja and karate chops me when I least expect it. I will be sitting in a meeting at work......and I have to apologize for the sudden look on my face or my outburst of "Geeze Louise!"

I have to follow it up with: "I'm fine. My child just punched me. Carry on."

2. At my appoitment on Monday- his heart rate was 160. 

3. The heartburn. 
I'm gonna make 99% of my readers hate me with this bullet point. I apologize. Here we go:

This has been the easiest pregnancy in the history of pregnancy's thus far. 

Don't forget though, it was an act of Congress to get here.

I have friends who:
-couldn't pull it together in their 1st trimester due to the nausea and throwing up;
-are currently on bedrest due to gestational diabetes;
- had food aversions or sensitivity to smells, etc;
- had debilitating migraines! 
- were put on bed rest due to extremely high blood pressure;
-laid in bed for 2 days with sick migraines; and
- endured back pain due to the baby sitting on a nerve. 

I'm all over here saying: Can I have more food? And maybe some ice cream too? Mexican anyone? 

However- I'm starting to experience heartburn for the 1st time ever in my life. I'm thinking about changing my diet to rice and bread. 

I asked my Dr. about it on Monday. I'm not to the point I want a prescription just yet because I'm weird.....so she suggested elevating the top of our bed where my head will be elevated. 

Listen. We are gonna jack that bed up this weekend! Bed, Bath, Beyond: I'm headed your way with a coupon in hand. 

To the ladies that hate me for having an easy pregnancy........just know that pregnancy #2 or #3 will probably be the death of me. Or, this baby boy will come out with his ninja moves in place and will be high spirited. I realize you can't have it all......which makes me scared about my future! 

4. The weight gain! I can't even tell you. 
I texted my weight gain to my closest friends, because we love to laugh at each other.....and I'm pretty sure they busted a gut when I told them how much I gained in 1 month! 
They busted their gut....and I've added padding to mine. 

Unfortunately, it has all gone to my face and booty. The sweet janitor at work told me that I have having a boy because my butt and hips are big! Thank you. And you are correct. On all accounts.

5. Several of you suggested reading '12 Hours Sleep by 12 Weeks.' The book is now mine and I have a brand new highlighter that I plan on using on the book. I may not have a baby that sleeps through the night......but by golly- I will have knowledge about it! 

Pregnancy Updates...

1. Baby Jones is moving around like CRAZY! I love every kick, punch, kart wheel and slap! I've waited a long time to feel these random crazy jabs when I'm least expecting them!

2. I'm reading Baby Wise....and it's made me realize I have a LOT of learning to do!

3. Sitting in Sunday School this past week, Baby Jones went NUTS! It don't know if it was the 9 donut holes that I ate for breakfast or if the baby was in a worshipful mood?!

4. I was texting my BFFS about the baby and nursery......and they were being so sweet and telling me how the only person that has met my baby has been Jesus. Well, that got me to thinking......I wonder how that convo may have went:

Jesus: Baby Jones, I'm sending you to Meg and H. Hey- don't worry....on the bright side, you will have 2 will fur brothers.

Baby Jones: NO! Not them! I'm gonna have a crazy mother! She is gonna hover! I just know it! And EVERYTHING will be monogrammed!

Jesus: Don't worry about her! She is very scattered brained! She sends her neighbor to her house at least once a week to check on something that she thinks she forgot to unplug! You'll be fine!

Baby Jones: Is it true that my parents have already proclaimed they don't want to take me to Disney World just because they don't like theme parks?!

Jesus: Yes! They did......but I have a feeling that once they meet you, and you ask nicely, they will have you on the Disney Cruise in no time! Oh.....I need to warn you, don't let Coopie lick you in the face! He eats his poop! Don't worry about your parents.....You will get use to the dysfunctional aspect very soon! You'll be fine! Your journey will begin in June. Prepare yourself. 

5. I try very hard to drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. In order to aid in the water drinking......my new favorite thing is add lemon, strawberry and kiwi to my water. Pretty tasty.

6. Just when I think I'm ready for childbirth........I realize that I'm not. Hopefully, after our childbirth class- I'll have a greater peace about it.

7. We have decided on a daycare for Baby Jones. I have mixed emotions about this. I haven't quite come to grips on how a feel. A part of me wants to have adult conversations and feel that I contribute monetarily to our family. The other part of me wants to rock our little burrito all day and have a home cooked meal every night. Meanwhile, Baby Jones is on a list. And it was strange writing their little name down.